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Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens

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ALA 2021 Rainbow List Pick Are you LGBTQ+? Not sure? Whether you're queer or questioning, understanding sexuality and gender identity can be confusing. And if you're a Christian, questions of identity can be even scarier. Is there something wrong with you? Will your friends accept you? When should you tell your family? What about church? Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Gu ALA 2021 Rainbow List Pick Are you LGBTQ+? Not sure? Whether you're queer or questioning, understanding sexuality and gender identity can be confusing. And if you're a Christian, questions of identity can be even scarier. Is there something wrong with you? Will your friends accept you? When should you tell your family? What about church? Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens has answers to all these questions and more. You'll get insight and support from an amazing group of LGBTQ+ professionals, as well as testimonies from young adult queer Christians who've recently been exactly where you are. You'll walk away with a lot of answers, prepared with tools to help. But most importantly, you'll hear the good news: God loves you exactly as you are. No matter your identity or where in your journey of self-discovery you find yourself, you got this.


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ALA 2021 Rainbow List Pick Are you LGBTQ+? Not sure? Whether you're queer or questioning, understanding sexuality and gender identity can be confusing. And if you're a Christian, questions of identity can be even scarier. Is there something wrong with you? Will your friends accept you? When should you tell your family? What about church? Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Gu ALA 2021 Rainbow List Pick Are you LGBTQ+? Not sure? Whether you're queer or questioning, understanding sexuality and gender identity can be confusing. And if you're a Christian, questions of identity can be even scarier. Is there something wrong with you? Will your friends accept you? When should you tell your family? What about church? Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens has answers to all these questions and more. You'll get insight and support from an amazing group of LGBTQ+ professionals, as well as testimonies from young adult queer Christians who've recently been exactly where you are. You'll walk away with a lot of answers, prepared with tools to help. But most importantly, you'll hear the good news: God loves you exactly as you are. No matter your identity or where in your journey of self-discovery you find yourself, you got this.

30 review for Queerfully and Wonderfully Made: A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens

  1. 5 out of 5

    Aud

    4.5, really well done. Practical, level-headed, loving advice for teens. Solid advice for things like sex (nothing explicit: focuses on consent and being safe), dating, dating apps, drugs (basically, don’t), drinking (also avoid/be careful), mental health, internet safety, harassment, and more. It’s not designed to be a be-all, end-all, more like a thorough introduction (which it is) for a wide range of kids in a wide range of circumstances who are a wide range of different kinds of queer. There 4.5, really well done. Practical, level-headed, loving advice for teens. Solid advice for things like sex (nothing explicit: focuses on consent and being safe), dating, dating apps, drugs (basically, don’t), drinking (also avoid/be careful), mental health, internet safety, harassment, and more. It’s not designed to be a be-all, end-all, more like a thorough introduction (which it is) for a wide range of kids in a wide range of circumstances who are a wide range of different kinds of queer. There’s tons of useful backmatter for further reading and research. I definitely appreciate how the book makes no bones about stuff. It flat-out says that if someone is trying to tell you that the way God made you is wrong, sinful, or bad, they are mistaken and you should not listen, even if it’s a parent, teacher, or priest. They don’t vilify these people, they just state facts. They also give a lot of stats about how things are improving in society (including American Christian society) and tips for managing life right now if things are rough (and they cover varying degrees of “rough”). They also don’t beat about the bush regarding conversion therapy: all of it, any kind, is dangerous and to be avoided if at all possible (which is backed by science). I wouldn’t have minded more about being asexual, though there was a chunk about it in the backmatter for further reading in addition to a little section of a chapter. They do explain how being ace is different from being celibate, which is good. So this is a minor quibble. The one thing that was left out that I thought was interesting was “how to deal with queer people or supposed queer allies who think you can’t be queer and Christian?” I’ve been challenged in a low-key way about this, with people acting like I’m a traitor or I’m having my cake and eating it too or something. It’s another minor quibble. Overall it’s very thorough, as I said. The tone is comfortable without trying too hard. It won’t quickly date itself with awkward slang, and doesn’t pretend to not be written by adults. But it’s NOT patronizing and it definitely respects its audience. The chapters are split into smaller sections and are easy to flip through: it’s an easy book to read and navigate, which makes it very accessible. A very recommended purchase for collections for kids age 13-25 or so (though it’s marketed to teens and assumes the readers are in high school, I think college-aged kids would find it useful, too).

  2. 4 out of 5

    Jennifer Morlan

    My church book group read this and it led to great conversations about how we can be better advocates and allies for our youth and the LGTBQ+ community. I highly recommend it!

  3. 4 out of 5

    Lori

    I really enjoyed this book! Each chapter is a topic, framed as a question an LGBTQIA+ teen might ask (or the questions the adults who love them wish they would ask). And the unrelenting YOU ARE BELOVED OF GOD repetition is so helpful! I bought 2 additional copies to give away, and will read the companion volume for adults who work with and love their queer teens next!

  4. 4 out of 5

    Jess Batten

    Clear & informative covering a holistic range of guidance and information. Personally, I would have liked some more places showing the intersection of faith and sexuality. I am however very happy that this guide exists!

  5. 4 out of 5

    Wesley Spears-Newsome

    Excellent resource! Will be a mainstay on my office bookshelf.

  6. 4 out of 5

    Hunter Kisper

    The thought behind it had well intentions. There's some general good affirming stuff in there, but for the most part it doesn't really have much to do with your Christian faith, just about being queer. Also there are a lot of statistics in there that were never backed up /sourced so I'm not sure how believable they are. It's a pretty good book in terms of figuring out what to do now that you figured out that your queer but beyond that there's really nothing, I would give this to somebody who was The thought behind it had well intentions. There's some general good affirming stuff in there, but for the most part it doesn't really have much to do with your Christian faith, just about being queer. Also there are a lot of statistics in there that were never backed up /sourced so I'm not sure how believable they are. It's a pretty good book in terms of figuring out what to do now that you figured out that your queer but beyond that there's really nothing, I would give this to somebody who wasn't Christian and I feel like they would not feel as if it were religious other than a few references to God.

  7. 5 out of 5

    TJ Shoemaker

    Complete rubbish. There is so much wrong that I can't even write it all in this review. pgs 144-154, 207 it's 11 pages on how to have queer sex. pgs 176-190, is 16 pages on how to be queer online. The back cover says "whether queer or questioning". BUT, this book is ONLY about affirming queerness, NOT understanding Christ or questioning your feelings. Page 32 “God is the one who made you queer let no one convince you otherwise. … Don't try to change yourself instead change your theology.” Page 4 Complete rubbish. There is so much wrong that I can't even write it all in this review. pgs 144-154, 207 it's 11 pages on how to have queer sex. pgs 176-190, is 16 pages on how to be queer online. The back cover says "whether queer or questioning". BUT, this book is ONLY about affirming queerness, NOT understanding Christ or questioning your feelings. Page 32 “God is the one who made you queer let no one convince you otherwise. … Don't try to change yourself instead change your theology.” Page 41 “Opening the door to the possibility that you might grow out of your LGBTQ+ identity has the potential to do real damage.” Pg 133 "What if I want to change? Dear one, we would ask you gently, Why do you want to change? ...If you're thinking anything like this, we need you to know the voices in your head telling you to change is not God's voice." It implies that it will help you if you are questioning your sexual preferences, but is actually saying "Why question it?" And don't listen to anyone who asks you too. Deceptive title. In no way does that help you understand your Christian faith. It does not provide biblical examples to support the thesis that the Bible promotes or accepts queerness, other than continual repeating of "God made you this way", which is not biblical. If we are to use this as a guideline why does the Jesus Christ tell us to repent? Of course we come to Him as we are, all sinners, and he tells us to repent and seek God's will, not our own. To repent means to turn away from our sin, all kinds of sin and embrace God's will. This book repeatedly says not to even question your actions.

  8. 5 out of 5

    Kasper

    Was looking for a good book on queerness for some queer Christian kids I work with so they don’t get all their information from goddamn tiktok and I’m delighted I found this one! Admittedly, I only skim read it, mostly to make sure that the values of the book aligned with their home churches (reconciling UMCs) in ways that would not alienate them and from what I read, this will be just about perfect. It’s written in a very friendly and affirming tone but does not try to be too down with the yout Was looking for a good book on queerness for some queer Christian kids I work with so they don’t get all their information from goddamn tiktok and I’m delighted I found this one! Admittedly, I only skim read it, mostly to make sure that the values of the book aligned with their home churches (reconciling UMCs) in ways that would not alienate them and from what I read, this will be just about perfect. It’s written in a very friendly and affirming tone but does not try to be too down with the youth. Very much appreciated that it did not rely on an overuse of current pop culture figures and franchises to be relatable as books that do age rather quickly. I think this one will stand up well. (I loved the mix of old and new in the LGBTQ alphabet interlude — it was very sweet.) Also appreciate that it did not shy away from frank discussions of sex — mainline protestant churches, no matter how affirming or progressive, tend to get a bit tetchy when you acknowledge that abstinence only education does not work. This book’s frank discussion of sex, what to expect, how to prepare for it (emotionally and physically), and the ways you can experience sex for the first time were very refreshing after my years in the trenches of headass protestant churches who refuse to acknowledge the realities of sex and teenagers (or, really, sex at any age for any reason other than procreation.) And of course, addressing the core of the book, queerness and Christianity — I think it did a great job of going through the reality of being a queer teen and going to a Christian church, which is that very often coming out may not go well, and even if it does go well, people may still be Really Weird But In An Affirming Way about your gender or sexuality due to your age. I very much appreciate that it gave the teens a script to follow for questions or situations they may find themselves answering or in about their gender or sexuality that they find uncomfortable or do not want to answer — it’s one thing to say, you don’t have to answer, and another to give actual ways to verbally shut down uncomfortable or inappropriate questions and conversations. I appreciated that a lot. I think some of the parts about questioning your identity and exploring it were a little hokey but maybe that’s because I’m terminally online and suffer “adult who spends too much time on twitter” brainrot. I’d rather the author be gently affirming and encouraging rather than not acknowledge that questioning is a part of the process (and a life long one at that!) This review is a bit off the cuff and mostly so I can organize my thoughts, so I apologize for the length. Great, accessible, friendly book. I’ll be making it available to the teens I work with for sure.

  9. 5 out of 5

    Anna

    This book seemed cool when I started to skim through it, but the more I read the less "Christian" it seemed. This could easily be a secular book if they took out the few references to God/church. Problems I had with this book: - Constantly using the word "queer" without acknowledging it has historically been used as a slur - Nothing about the typical Christian/Biblical arguments against same-sex relationships and how to refute them - Implies that pornography and premarital sex are perfectly fine if This book seemed cool when I started to skim through it, but the more I read the less "Christian" it seemed. This could easily be a secular book if they took out the few references to God/church. Problems I had with this book: - Constantly using the word "queer" without acknowledging it has historically been used as a slur - Nothing about the typical Christian/Biblical arguments against same-sex relationships and how to refute them - Implies that pornography and premarital sex are perfectly fine if done "responsibly" - Saying that Joan of Arc was queer because she dressed as a man (insert big eyeroll here...clothing and "not being girly enough" should not define someone's gender/sexuality) - Overall rather flippant about bad things that could happen - "yeah your church might not be accepting and conversion therapy is a thing, but in most cases it's perfectly fine to come out" (not a direct quote, just my own summary) - Hardly anything about asexual people, and a very clinical definition of asexuality - "Basically, asexuals don't have hormonal, chemical, or physical interest in sex, and if that sounds like you, then read more on asexuality. It might be you forever, or for now, or never." (pp. 209-210) So, first it makes asexuality sound like a physical disease/deformity, and then implies it's often a phase. Yuck. Side note, someone should really write a book about asexuality and Christianity. I'd love to read an in-depth exploration of that. I think this is a decent book to have in a public library or school library for kids/teens who are exploring their identity, but I wouldn't personally recommend it.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Leonard

    Subtitled "A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens" this worthwhile book is full of useful information for guiding LGBTQ+ teens over the pitfalls they face in their lives. Human sexuality and gender issues are getting more and more complex, or perhaps they've always been complex and we've recently been allowed to openly talk about it. The glossary in this book includes twelve different types of gender, or different gender terms. Many LGBTQ+ people are not welcome in some Christian churches and organi Subtitled "A Guide for LGBTQ+ Christian Teens" this worthwhile book is full of useful information for guiding LGBTQ+ teens over the pitfalls they face in their lives. Human sexuality and gender issues are getting more and more complex, or perhaps they've always been complex and we've recently been allowed to openly talk about it. The glossary in this book includes twelve different types of gender, or different gender terms. Many LGBTQ+ people are not welcome in some Christian churches and organizations but it's difficult to imagine Jesus not welcoming them. Other congregations and denominations including the congregation and denomination I'm a part of are thankfully welcoming LGBTQ+ teens. This title deals with any concerns facing LGBTQ+ teens, including how to tell others, family, church, school, who you are...or not tell them, conversion therapy and why it doesn't work, bathroom use, sexual intimacy, pornography, and other concerns. The forward is written by Jennifer Knapp, a former evangelical singer, with some great music to her credit, who was rejected by her church when she was honest about her gender status. If you know a LGBTQ+ teen trying to stay connected to Christianity, this book might be very helpful.

  11. 4 out of 5

    Tami Havel Paalman

    This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. This book seriously annoyed me. I consider myself a Christian and have studied religion in general for decades. I have certifications and alumni credits and past church credentials galore . All this book said to me was that if you are a teen who is anything other than heterosexual, God loves you and accepts you as He created you . Of course, that sounds AMAZING! However, the message also encourages you to walk away from any figure/person in your life who does not 100% support you . The FACT that This book seriously annoyed me. I consider myself a Christian and have studied religion in general for decades. I have certifications and alumni credits and past church credentials galore . All this book said to me was that if you are a teen who is anything other than heterosexual, God loves you and accepts you as He created you . Of course, that sounds AMAZING! However, the message also encourages you to walk away from any figure/person in your life who does not 100% support you . The FACT that this book quotes scripture only a handful of times does not make it a Christian resource to me. I felt sad reading it as I truly wanted to recommend it to a teen who is questioning their sexuality and has questions about their faith in regards to it. I do thank God that I read it before recommending it.

  12. 4 out of 5

    Victor

    This was such a great book, and I wish I had something like this when I was a teen. The language this book uses is gentle, loving, and affirming, which I think is something that a lot of queer teens need. I know this is a guide for Christian LGBTQ+ teens, but I honestly think this is a great resource for queer teens in general. There are enough LGBTQ+ topics here that are important for the whole community that I would recommend any queer teen take a look if they have questions. It's nice knowing This was such a great book, and I wish I had something like this when I was a teen. The language this book uses is gentle, loving, and affirming, which I think is something that a lot of queer teens need. I know this is a guide for Christian LGBTQ+ teens, but I honestly think this is a great resource for queer teens in general. There are enough LGBTQ+ topics here that are important for the whole community that I would recommend any queer teen take a look if they have questions. It's nice knowing that no matter what section they decide to read they will have an informative and affirming voice giving them the information they need, while celebrating their queerness. I cannot recommend this resource enough!

  13. 4 out of 5

    Alvera

    pg. 14 "But here's the thing. Most people -- queer or not -- don't know absolutely who they are and who they will be forever....What we do know is that being queer is a process, and that exploring and accepting that process is an essential, and exciting, part of what it means to be queer." This book is written in a question-and-answer format and seems to be meant to act almost like a big brother or sister might, but with a tad more authority. I appreciated the straightforward information, advice, pg. 14 "But here's the thing. Most people -- queer or not -- don't know absolutely who they are and who they will be forever....What we do know is that being queer is a process, and that exploring and accepting that process is an essential, and exciting, part of what it means to be queer." This book is written in a question-and-answer format and seems to be meant to act almost like a big brother or sister might, but with a tad more authority. I appreciated the straightforward information, advice, reassurances, and lists of resources; my daughter appreciated the humor and sass. A great addition to the bookshelf of any LGBTQ+ affirming church.

  14. 5 out of 5

    Beth Culp

    What I liked about this collection of essays and stories was that it gave so many great basic breakdowns around coming out safely, finding community and advocating for yourself, and creating plans around finding a safe place if things don't go well. It didn't go very in depth into the theology part, and truthfully that's likely better in a separate book. There were verses sprinkled throughout, which I appreciated because it wasn't bogging the reader down while still driving home the message. The m What I liked about this collection of essays and stories was that it gave so many great basic breakdowns around coming out safely, finding community and advocating for yourself, and creating plans around finding a safe place if things don't go well. It didn't go very in depth into the theology part, and truthfully that's likely better in a separate book. There were verses sprinkled throughout, which I appreciated because it wasn't bogging the reader down while still driving home the message. The main takeaway is: if you are able to come out and express safely, do it! If you are not able to come out, please wait until it is safe to do so.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Esperanza

    An amazing book written to help teens who are LGBTQIA+ and Christian. A perfect read for anyone that is contemplating coming out, or has just come out. Also makes a perfect book for anyone with a friend or loved one who has just come out. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. God made you as you are, in their image. You were queerfully and wonderfully made, and God doesn't make mistakes. Ten stars. An amazing book written to help teens who are LGBTQIA+ and Christian. A perfect read for anyone that is contemplating coming out, or has just come out. Also makes a perfect book for anyone with a friend or loved one who has just come out. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. God made you as you are, in their image. You were queerfully and wonderfully made, and God doesn't make mistakes. Ten stars.

  16. 4 out of 5

    Aster

    My mom recently edited a book kind of like this one (Listen, Learn, and Love by Richard Ostler), except it was geared towards non-LGBTQIA+ adults and it was specifically about the LDS church (you might know them better as Mormons), so finding this in the local library was an interesting coincidence.

  17. 4 out of 5

    Jill

    the straightforward, safe, and friendly writing style reminded me of some of the american girl (non fiction) content i read back in the day, which i like. also back in that day i was really hungry for this kind of information and i wasn't getting it anywhere especially from a christian perspective and i would've really appreciated this book then. the straightforward, safe, and friendly writing style reminded me of some of the american girl (non fiction) content i read back in the day, which i like. also back in that day i was really hungry for this kind of information and i wasn't getting it anywhere especially from a christian perspective and i would've really appreciated this book then.

  18. 5 out of 5

    BookishBat

    Such a great read! This book explains how it's okay to be both LGBTQ+ and Christian (finally!). Goes into info about being LGBTQ+, ways to deal with hateful people, and so forth. Author constantly reminds readers that they are loved by God no matter what other people say and that being themselves is not wrong. Such a great read! This book explains how it's okay to be both LGBTQ+ and Christian (finally!). Goes into info about being LGBTQ+, ways to deal with hateful people, and so forth. Author constantly reminds readers that they are loved by God no matter what other people say and that being themselves is not wrong.

  19. 4 out of 5

    Bethany

    If you know of LGBTQIA+ teens who are struggling with their queerness, especially in how it relates to their church life, I highly recommend this book. I purchased it for the library I work at and leafed through it this evening. It is just beautiful, y’all. 😍

  20. 5 out of 5

    Emily Ruth

    Excellent resource. I have never read a book like this and I am so glad it exists in the world. Level headed, never condescending, and realistic. In addition to the book as a whole, the glossary and resources in the back of the book are a wealth of knowledge and guidance.

  21. 5 out of 5

    Ms. Stephens

    This was more Scripture-lite than I'd hoped. Very affirming, but mostly about coming out and safe sex, mental illness, and suicide, than how to refute people who wield the Bible against LGBTQIA+ folks. Still, I wish I could put it in my classroom! This was more Scripture-lite than I'd hoped. Very affirming, but mostly about coming out and safe sex, mental illness, and suicide, than how to refute people who wield the Bible against LGBTQIA+ folks. Still, I wish I could put it in my classroom!

  22. 4 out of 5

    Grayson Sinclair

    It was okay but honestly wasn't too much of a fun read It was okay but honestly wasn't too much of a fun read

  23. 4 out of 5

    naomi

    as a queer christian, this book made me feel so seen.

  24. 4 out of 5

    Gretchen Gingerich

    I like how affirming it is but it gets repetitive and makes some large-ish assumptions. I like the resource list. Reads like a handbook for teens (by teens).

  25. 4 out of 5

    John

    What a wonderful, life-affirming study and guide for youth of the church.

  26. 4 out of 5

    Elanna Erhardt

    This is a great, interactive guide with current statistics on self-care, mental health, sex, drug-use and more. It takes the approach that information protects teens more than ignorance does.

  27. 4 out of 5

    Maddie

    A guide for queer christian teens with information on anything they might have questions about; coming out, identities, conversion therapy, sex, the internet and so much more. This guide is written like an older sibling/wiser friend is telling you what life is actually like. It had a great list of resources in the back and throughout. The only issue I really have with this book is that it feels like it should have been printed in color and not black and white. But literally everything else about A guide for queer christian teens with information on anything they might have questions about; coming out, identities, conversion therapy, sex, the internet and so much more. This guide is written like an older sibling/wiser friend is telling you what life is actually like. It had a great list of resources in the back and throughout. The only issue I really have with this book is that it feels like it should have been printed in color and not black and white. But literally everything else about this book is very well done. I encourage giving this book to queer teens who are in some version of church.

  28. 5 out of 5

    Acacia

    I'd recommend this to someone who was struggling with their queer identity in a religious context, it covered a wide array of topics in a factual and clear cut manner, it doesn't sugar coat anything either which is amazing, it also provides an amazing array of resources at the end of the book. That being said, there is one complaint that I have. I'm not impressed with the fact that asexuality was really quickly glossed over in 2 paragraphs nor with the definition that was used. I would have love I'd recommend this to someone who was struggling with their queer identity in a religious context, it covered a wide array of topics in a factual and clear cut manner, it doesn't sugar coat anything either which is amazing, it also provides an amazing array of resources at the end of the book. That being said, there is one complaint that I have. I'm not impressed with the fact that asexuality was really quickly glossed over in 2 paragraphs nor with the definition that was used. I would have loved to see a little bit about how growing up aro or ace in a church environment has its own struggles that are really unique.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Tracy

    Queerfully and Wonderfully Made will improve life for so many Christian teenagers who are LGBTQ+ or even uncertain about where they are. Christian LGBTQ+ teens are at a higher risk for suicide than non-Christian LGBTQ+ teens. Think about that. This book is practical and factual, and full of great advice. Here are several gems from page 28 that would be helpful for every kid, regardless of gender or sexuality: "Not every adult should be considered an authority figure!" "It's not your job to educat Queerfully and Wonderfully Made will improve life for so many Christian teenagers who are LGBTQ+ or even uncertain about where they are. Christian LGBTQ+ teens are at a higher risk for suicide than non-Christian LGBTQ+ teens. Think about that. This book is practical and factual, and full of great advice. Here are several gems from page 28 that would be helpful for every kid, regardless of gender or sexuality: "Not every adult should be considered an authority figure!" "It's not your job to educate the adults in your life." It covers everything from how much God loves each individual exactly how they are to when to come out (and whether it is safe) to bullying to safe sex and what consent looks like. I hope this book finds its way to the people who need it most.

  30. 5 out of 5

    Teresa Thompson

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